Now? Well now I feel like I've run into a brick wall.
I think I caught a terrible virus..... writers block.
Or maybe its just procrastination. I don't know to be honest , but what I do know is that the cure for writers block is to write. Which I don't really understand but it has worked for me in the past so I'm going with it.
Instead of butchering my manuscript I'm going to write here, some ridiculous story, that as I am typing this now, have no clue who, what, when, where, how, why. It's just going to be like word vomit. Hopefully not as disgusting as actual vomit but I hope it will make me feel as good as I do after I actually vomit. That way I can get back to work on my book.
So, here is goes and I hope you enjoy whatever it is this story decides to become.
CAUTION: Dread carefully, this story is absolutely ridiculous and if you have no sense of humor or lack childlike foolishness please don't read on. Actually read it. You need grow down. Yes grow down not grow up. Be silly for God's sake.
Once upon a time there was a critter named Jeeves. Jeeves was a short and studdly critter with purple hair and fuzzy pink polka dots. He never knew understood why he looked the way he did or lived where he lived or even why his name was Jeeves. In fact there was a lot of things Jeeves didn't understand. But one thing that troubled him most was why were all the other critters were blue and green and yellow?
Jeeves believed he was the only critter in the Hoompla Forest that was purple with pink polka dots and this made him very sad. He felt so alone. All of the other critters wouldn't talk to him because he was different, they wouldn't let him play Goosha, (A game involving throwing coconuts into snake holes, whoever got bit the least after using all of the coconuts wins), he had never known the joy of biting into a scrumptious Klaj tart ( Klaj is a fruit native to the Hoompla Forest and a delicacy to the critters. Its taste is a combination of green tea, vinegar and lemon meringue pie.) and whenever Jeeves would try to talk to the other critters they would poke at his spots like buttons and mimic his voice every time he tried to speak.
Of course this made Jeeves very mad and he retreated deep into the forest. He pouted and cried and pouted and cried some more. "Wish I was like those other critters." he said. "Then I could eat all the Klaj tart I want and play Goosha. Goosha is no fun by yourself."
He walked and he walked until he tripped and landed face first into a pile of pink fuzz.
He jumped up and started to sneeze, the pink fuzz was all over him. He sneezed and tried the brush the fuzz off. He found it strange that the fuzz was the same color as his polka dots but he didn't give it any more thought as he continued his walk deeper into the forest.
"Who dares enter my realm" a voice booms, shaking the trees, and blowing tiny tornados of dirt and leaves.
Jeeves voice shakes as he answers the mysterious voices question. "I did, um, my name is Jeeves, I'm, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to."
"Jeeves you say." the voice bellows, and a tall silver man with black eyes glides out of the shadows. Jeeves studies him and thinks it is strange the man only has hair on top of his head. "why are you here, critters never come to my part of the forest."
"I know but I could not live there anymore. I am different and they are mean to me."
"You are running away from your problems young critter. It will never solve anything."
"Alone is what will protect me. No one to jab at my spots, no one to mimic my voice. And no one to reject me."
"You are never truly alone."
"I was until you showed up."
"You may run away from the critters that hurt you, but the most evil critter that can do the most damage to your poor critter soul is you. You jab at your polka dots, you mimic yourself, and reject the happiness that tries to come into you life."
Jeeves looks at the silver man incredulously and starts to laugh. "What did you do, swallow a Yudi bean" (Equivalent to a fortune cookie)
"I kid you not young critter. But because you have not taken my advice I will have to punish you."
"Punish me? For what?"
"I am a lot older and wiser than you Mr. Jeeves. I know what I am talking about, you did not have to make a fool out of me. Therefore you will have one wish that will be granted to you."
"A wish? That is my punishment? What kind of wish? Can I wish for more wishes?"
"No. Only one wish. You can wish for whatever your heart desires."
Jeeves knew exactly what he wanted and he did not hesitate "I want to be like the other blue and green and yellow critters. I want to fit in with them"
"As you wish."
With a wave of his hand Jeeves polka dots slowly disappeared one by one. His bright purple fur slowly faded into the most vibrant turquoise. Jeeves howled with joy, "Those critters are going to be so jealous of my fur. I am so beautiful now."
The silver man said nothing as he disappeared back into the shadows.
Jeeves started to sprint back to his village, but before he got there he stumbled across the same pile of pink fuzz as he did before. He stepped around it, careful not to get a single strand of hair on his new turquoise coat.
When he arrived at his village and of the other critters looked stunned at Jeeves new fur.
"Play Goosha with me Jeeves."
"No me first!"
"Here Jeeves, try this Klaj tart I made especially for you."
Jeeves was very happy for a bit, but soon the fame and the attention began to wear off. And that same loneliness crept back up on him.
That evening Jeeves decided to take walk into the forest again. As he was walking he expected to find the same pile of pink fuzz as he did before but instead of pile there was a trail. Naturally he followed this trail, at the end of it there was a little critter with light purple fur and fuzzy pink polka dots raking the pink fuzz into neat little piles.
Jeeves screamed then hid into the bushes. The purple critter threw the rake up in the air and fell backwards landing on his head. He looked around terrified not knowing where the scream came from. Shaking he picked up the rake and took off running following the trail of pink fuzz.
Jeeves followed him, making sure to stay out of sight.
He was amazed at what he saw when the critter finally arrived at his destination. Hundreds and hundreds of purple and pink critters scurrying about, eating Klaj tarts and tons of other stuff that he had never seen but it all looked delicious. They played Goosha and some other games Jeeves never knew existed.
He went to step out into the village when he looked down at his fur. He didn't belong there anymore. So went into the forest and squished purple berries on his fur. Then he took bright pink flowers and hit himself with them randomly, giving him polka dots.
He finally stepped out into the village and the critters greeted him with open arms. Never had Jeeves been so happy. He played all the same game and ate all the same treats, as well as some new favorites. (Wackleberry cookies, truff fries, and Joca cake)
But his fun would not last. Thunder shook the ground and rain started to fall from the sky. Jeeves played in the rain with his new friends. But suddenly all of the critters stopped and looked at him fearfully, then they started to throw stuff at him, rocks, cakes, chairs. He didn't understand.
But in a puddle he saw his purple and pink dye. He looked at his newly vibrant turquoise hands. Full of hurt and rage he took off into the forest.
"Silver man! Silver man!" he yelled.
Jeeves jumped and turned towards him
"You did this to me! Change me back. I want to be me again."
"I did not do this to you young critter. This is what you wanted. I tried to warn you. I cannot grant you another wish."
"But you have to." he cried. "I want to be with the other critters like me, like how I was before."
"It is too late." and the silver man vanished.
Jeeves returned to his own village very sad. He heard the laughter of the purple and pink critters as he passed but knew he could never be with them again. He should never of changed to be accepted by the critters who did not like him in the first place when there were other critters just like him, who liked him for who he was.
Jeeves was a pink and polka dot critter stuck in a blue critter world.